June 29, 2008
Text: John 21:15-19
Pr. Robert Goldstein
The Grace of Forgiveness

The Gospel reading this morning, as usual, has great depth. May we ask the Spirit of God let us plumb that depth.

Sophia Petrillo of the Golden Girls resolves to return to her little isolated village in Sicily to ask forgiveness from Guido. She had been betrothed to Guido, but ran away to America. So she flies to Rome, takes a train to Naples, a ferry to Sicily and a donkey to the village -all at 84 years of age. At last, she finally enters the village and is told where Guido is: in the tavern where he always is. Exhausted she enters the dark tavern and searching around at last she finds a shriveled up old Guido at his table looking solemnly into his wine. He looks up. "Guido?" "Yes?" "I'm Sophia your betrothed and I have come all this way from America to ask your forgiveness. I am truly sorry and I need your forgiveness! I wronged you. Please give me your forgiveness." Guido looks up, tilts his head at her than looks down to his wine and says gruffly, "Aww, forget about it!" and goes back to his bottle. The studio audience laughs. Perhaps you may laugh too, because this story teases the depths that the Gospel plumbs. Humor often has great depth and irony.

Peter and the disciples are back in the world they know best: fishing. Here they are at home. With the Jesus' movement thing they were out of their depth. But now the Jesus, they and especially Peter betrayed, is standing on the shore in resurrected glory. Forgiveness always borders on the miraculous. All of us, in some way or other, have let down another person during our lives. Perhaps we have gone so far as to betray them. As one who left a marriage of 19 years, I know how deeply guilt can cut into the hearts of us who betray. And this is the depth into which Peter jumps into the sea to reach Jesus on the shore.

It is this context and depth that Jesus first breaks bread with them -communing with his betrayers, the worst of whom is Peter. Jesus does not even ask for their confession before this communion, but invites them into the communal humanity of us all -the need and the joy of eating together. No doubt the silence of this meal is freighted with their growing consciousness that having escaped from Jesus' death to fishing, he has come to them! He's come to us! And as they eat the fish and the bread they must have begun to ask themselves in growing dread, "What does Jesus want?"

When we betray someone, deepest in our spirituality arises the longing to be forgiven, to make things right. To be freed from that past. But in such a deep issue, in spite of all the self-help culture, one cannot forgive oneself. We may let go of self-blame for our past failures. But we usually bury our guilt deeply -covering it by the experiences required to survive, making the most of our time on earth. But we cannot forgive ourselves. Only two persons can-God and the person we have betrayed.

And that's why Jesus appears to his re-gathered disciples and to us. That's why we break bread together in the Presence of Jesus: to reach those depths and to wait on forgiveness. For forgiveness is not taken. Forgiveness is not something we can do. Forgiveness is granted, given to us from without just as the bread wine. Forgiveness is an act of grace, the greatest teacher of grace.

So, after breakfast, in their depths of conscience, Jesus singles out his chief betrayer, Peter. To forgive someone, you see, takes a great deal of courage wedded to such simplicity that what really matters in life is human relationships in community. And Jesus, once again, manifests this graciousness and mentors its value for our sakes. Instead of scathing scorn that the betrayed often wreak on their penitent betrayers, Jesus shows what love is, in the midst of the worst betrayal. Three times Jesus asks Peter if he really loves him. This number of times becomes painful to Peter, and on the third time Peter shows his hurt. He remembers too well that he betrayed Jesus three times before the rooster crowed!

When we seek forgiveness from someone, we are helpless as we wait. It is likely that we too will be reminded of our betrayals. Like Peter, we endure. Like Peter, this calls the very best of patience and genuine love from us arises by the Holy Spirit. Jesus calls forth the best from Peter. Do you love me, Peter? Do you love me? Do you love me? Jesus doesn't declare Peter is forgiven but shows it by the confidence he has in offering Peter the opportunity to lead, to feed Jesus' sheep. Then he adds this odd remark, "Very truly, I tell you, when you were younger, you used to fasten your own belt and to go wherever you wished. But when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will fasten a belt around you and take you where you do not wish to go." Jesus is saying, just as forgiveness is something given to you, so is your vocation. In your youth you thought you were in control of your destiny, but, as you learn, you are not, even as chief of God's apostles. Every elderly person will confirm this. How hard it is to give up driving! How confining is a wheelchair in a nursing home -pushed around where you do not necessarily wish to go.

The author of this text says Jesus' words were a prophecy of Peter's martyrdom -and certainly, martyrdom is surely not where Peter envisioned. Events take him there. But the text also means that when you seek to minister or even seek forgiveness from someone that you are not in control of anyone's heart. We are solely dependent upon God's grace to change all hearts.

What does this mean for us? On this day we celebrate Pride for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and queer. Straight and gay celebrate this together. Pride still has the power to make us feel good about ourselves, for many of us grew up in far less hospitable times. Public affirmation like this allows us to forgive our culture for betraying us by teaching us to deny our deepest identities. It is a celebration fraught with the depths of this text -to receive the grace to forgive the unforgiven in our past. On this day there are many of us who have been rejected by our parents, spouses and even our children. Some of us are like Peter, unforgiven and thus incomplete in our spirituality. Many more of us are wronged, betrayed by parents and siblings and our churches. But Jesus shows the way.

Jesus doesn't reject Peter, but forgives the man with all his failings by calling him to the good things he could yet accomplish. We are invited to receive that same grace to dare to forgive those who have wronged us -so that good things may yet happen in those broken relationships. And even when some are beyond our reach, from stubborn prejudice or even death, our forgiving the wrongs against us will give us the same good life Jesus gave Peter. Amen